Another Gray Hair

Rage Against the Machine

What's every parent's Christmas nightmare? We've all been there. We've got our Santa clothes on and finally have the kids secure in their beds. We unload the items from the attic and bring them down to the living room to begin the assembly process. Some of us drink a few cocktails and watch It's A Wonderful Life, trying to savor every minute of it. Until the minutes become hours. Why? Because of the ridiculous measures that toy manufacturers take to securely fasten the toys to the packaging so that they are displayed to utter perfection on the store shelves, catching the eye of young passer-bys. These days the displays involve all manner of torture devices from plastic wrapped wire to strategically placed rubber bands, screws and industrial staples. It all adds up to a frustration filled Christmas Eve when Santa hats become sweat bands and holiday cheer turns into yuletide rage.

Time allotted for assembly of the Littlest Pet Shop Fitness Center: 5 minutes.

Actual time required: 47 minutes

Cost: your mental health

After five or six of these episodes, you are tired, frazzled, angry and half drunk and the pile of trash that has accumulated in the corner is beginning to resemble the debris of a demolished building.

The purpose of this post is not to wallow in this misery but to let parents in on a genius little secret: THIS CAN ALL BE AVOIDED!

In a move that can only be classified as genius, Amazon.com has partnered with Mattel and other manufacturers to provide its customers with "Frustration Free Packaging." What this means for me is that the Barbie Cruise Ship (no, my daughter is not into age-appropriate toys) that I ordered yesterday will arrive on my doorstep in a big cardboard box with zero packaging. They'll be no clear plastic viewing window, no attempt at aesthetic shelf appeal, just a toy in a box, a big, glorious toy in a box. This brings me great joy and hope for humanity and, coupled with the free shipping offered on many Amazon.com products and their low prices, gives me almost no motivation to shop elsewhere.

So, get out there and rage against the department store machine and do your holiday shopping at Amazon.com. Maybe toy manufacturers will take the hint and do a little good for our collective mental health and the environment and get rid of the ridiculous over-packaging that has taken over store shelves of late.

Ugly Dawg

I would like to formally welcome our gently (OK, this may be a stretch)-used pop-up trailer into the household. Lovingly dubbed, "Ugly Dawg" by my camping-enthusiast friend Jacquelyn because of the presence of a very sweet but aesthetically-challenged dog on the property where we purchased it, the trailer is sitting in my drive-way, begging me to take it somewhere. Sure, she might have a dent or two in her exterior and a couple patches of duct tape but ol' Ugly Dawg has it where it counts: AC, hot water, and a giant storage container. She hasn't got a leak on her and can be easily pulled by our minivan. 

So, if you see a gently used pop-up being pulled by a blue minivan cruising by you on the interstate, give her a honk. It's Ol' Ugly Dawg heading out for some memory makin' in the woods somewhere with the Hale family.

We're heading to Stone Mountain Memorial Day weekend. Our goal is to skip the repeat of last year and NOT find a dead body in our campsite. It's lofty I know but say a little prayer that we can accomplish it. Oh, and we'd also prefer not to be haunted by her ghost. That would be a nice bonus.

Big News

I found out this morning that Hale baby #3 is on it's way. I thought I'd throw it out in the blogosphere for all of my friends and family to see, save me the trouble of calling so many people.

Creative Ways to Downsize the Holidays

An article I wrote was published in the e-zine Simple Joy. Check it out:

http://www.simplejoy.org/downsize_the_holidays.htm

Announcements Announcements Announcements

I've got a few random musings today. First, my Halloween article was published and I am quite proud of it. It's the type of writing that I would like to do on a regular basis.

Second, I have been working on my personal website for the past few days and have published it. Check it out:

http://www.juliannehale.com

Please send me some feedback if you have any thoughts. My friends have informed me that I need more color.

Finally, my friend, Bianca Pierce, took some pictures of my kids this morning and managed to capture this shot:

Isn't it fabulous? The girl's got talent! Here's her website:

http://biancajpiercephotography.blogspot.com/